Thursday, August 12, 2010

Should I tell my hubby that I'm not happy

My hubby - Mr. T - asked me what was bothering me yestrday and I just told him that I couldn't really talk text about it at that moment, but that I wasn't really happy with some things. I love Mr. T but lately I have been feeling unhappy with him. He started a new job after being unemployed for a year, and he does nothing but complain. Every day I receive atleast 3 texts form him telling me how bad the job is, how it's just what he thought it would be, blah, blah. I know it's bad, but at some point I would just like him to suck-it-up and take one for the team. I hate my job, but I try not to bore him with every single thing that's bothering me throughout the day (our cell phone bill would be sky high).

Also, he's gained quite a bit of weight over the past year. I know he's depressed from not working, but he doesn't seem to really care that much about making a change. I definately have some weight to lose also, but I try to make changes. I'm frustrated that he doesn't do the same.

I can't complain though about everything, he does help out around the house a bit, and is very hands on with the lil ones.However, even though he was home for a year, I think he only cleaned our bathroom once. I probably should've asked, but honestly if you're home all day it would be nice if you did alittle bit extra.

I think all of that above has been on my mind, and I just don't feel like I can talk to him about it. For one reason, I don't want to put that pressure on him. I don't want him to feel worse about himself. Also, I feel like there are plenty of things that I could do more of or less of when it comes to our home and relationship, so why should I compain?!

I really believe though that I may be going through some type of 30's life crisis - if that's possible. I became a mom when I was 21 and I feel like I missed out some of my life. I also didn't have much of a childhood, so I just feel like I jipped myself a bit. There are so many things that I want to do (finish college, spend more time making friends & hanging out with them) but my life just doesn't have room for that now.

I'm scared to tell him all that. Why am I scared to tell him? I think that I need to tell him some of it, but I don't feel safe telling him it all - atleast not right now.

Maybe once we tackle the household issues I have, which are easier to talk about, then maybe we can tackle the complaining, and then later the weight issue.

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